funny-humor

A WOMEN’S REVENGE

I was working at the checkout in the supermarket one day.
‘Cash, check or charge?’ I asked, after packing item’s the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
So, do you always carry your TV remote? I asked.
No, she replied, but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.

A WOMAN’S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She’s sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheatie’s box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

COWS

Is it just me, or do’es anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost three year’s ago, right to the stall where she slept in the county of Cumbria? And, they even tracked her calve’s to their stall’s.

But they are unable to locate 125,000 illegal immigrant’s wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

TEN COMMANDMENTS

The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandment’s posted in a courthouse or Parliament, is this –

You cannot post:- ‘Thou Shalt Not Steal’, ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery’ and ‘Thou Shall Not Lie’ in a building full of lawyer’s, judge’s and politician’s….. It create’s a hostile work environment.

FAT BUM

My wife went shopping and brought back a pair of trouser’s/slack’s.

She went and tried them on and came down to show me .

Then she asked ” doe’s my bum look big in these ”

I answered ” wait and i’ll move back to get the whole picture in ”

I don’t think she liked like my reply.

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11 responses to “funny-humor

  1. “give each of them a cow.” Love the idea. I’m in a different country, but we have the same problem.

  2. I know you are, but maybe all the storm’s your getting will drive them out 🙂

    do you like my background

  3. We lady’s do have our ways of keeping you males in line. And the mad cow thing, if you run out of illegal immigrants to give them to, I’ve a few politicians I’d like to have receive one.
    Sandy
    http://www.sandysays1.wordpress.com

  4. Hi Sara, i’m going to change the photo everyweek just to be different.

  5. Give them each a cow lol 😀 You are funny for sure. I almost choked on my green tea.

  6. ‘Wait and I’ll move back to get the whole picture in’. Thanks for the laugh (though I had a mouthful of coffee – nearly spat it all over the screen!)

  7. Hahaha… loved this post! Especially the first one about the remote. But the cow one made me laugh too 😉

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