Enjoy the gifs, there’s more to come, and thank you Karen for sending them.
Some have asked what I’m going to be doing in retirement. Well, I applied for a building permit for a new house.
It was going to be 100 ft tall and 400 ft wide, with 12 gun turrets at various heights, and windows all over the place and a loud outside entertainment sound system that was going to entertain the whole neighbourhood.
Posted in humor, jokes
Tagged Building a Mosque, building controls, building permit, building permit for a new house, government, humour, joke, Mosque, Mosque building, retirement
The Hotel Bill
An older lady decided to give herself a big treat for her 70th birthday
by staying overnight in a really nice hotel. When she checked out the
next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250.00.
She demanded to know why the charge was so high. “I agree it’s a nice hotel, but the rooms aren’t worth $250.00 for just an overnight stay! I didn’t even have breakfast.”
An older gentleman was on the operating table
awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son,
a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anaesthesia,he asked to speak to his son.
“Yes, Dad , what is it?”
“Don’t be nervous, son; do your best, and just remember,
if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me,
your mother is going to come and
live with you and your wife….”
Eventually you will reach a point
when you stop lying about your age
and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love
to hear them say “you don’t look that old.”
This post is from a very special mans blog, please visit.
WHAT IF OTHER COMPANIES BESIDES DUREX MADE CONDOMS….
Ladies, don’t you just hate it?? …you get all dressed up …hot to trot !!!…then you catch glimpse of yourself in a mirror.
And suddenly you realize..your forgot the lipstick…the whole look gone for a crap right there !!!.
LOL!!! a bit of humor to brighten your day!!
When God created
Adam and Eve, He said:
I only have two gifts:
One is the art of peeing standing …
And then Adam stepped forward and shouted:
ME!, ME!, ME!,
I would love it please … Lord, please, please!
Look, it will make my life substantially easier.
Eve nodded, and said those things did not matter to her. Continue reading
Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around WalMart when they collide.
The old guy says to the young guy,
“Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”
The young guy says, “That’s OK, it’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too… I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.”
The old guy says, “Well, maybe I can help you find her… what does she look like?”
The young guy says,
“Well, she is 27 years old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, is buxom…wearing no bra, long legs, and is wearing short shorts.
What does your wife look like?’
To which the old guy says, “Doesn’t matter,
— let’s look for yours.”
Horses in the race are:
1. Passionate Lady
2. Bare Belly
3. Silk Panties
5. Jockey Shorts
6. Clean Sheets
8. Big Johnson
9. Heavy BOSOM
10. Merry Cherry
I have often wondered why tits go south.
Is it because of gravity, something in their genes or is it inherited.
There must be something that pulls the tits south.
Is it because of the sun, moon or the stars.
There really is no answer, because all tits don’t go south.
Do you know different, have you a reason.
Leave your answer below please.
For Those Who Thought They Knew Everything
Here’s A Refreasher Course….
The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for Blood plasma
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times
Donkeys kill more people annually
than plane crashes or shark attacks. (So, watch your Ass )